This article is best paired with this song. Press “play,” then read on.
The truth is, about one year ago, I was secretly dealing with depression, endlessly thinking about quitting my job, and fed up with everything.
I was fed up with my career path and my direction. I was fed up with the fitness industry, which I was struggling to succeed in.
For as much I was learning, I hated how negligent trainers around me were making more money, getting better clients, moving up, etc.
I was fed up with being a “knowledgable trainer” (their words, not mine), but making $700 a paycheck.
I was fed up with how internet trainers continuously put self-serving updates about how great they were, how great their clients were, half-naked pictures, and — like — shit about cats.
“I don’t get it,” I thought. What the fuck am I missing?
At the time, I was working for a commercial gym that didn’t value its employees and clients. But I needed the paycheck. I wanted to write for fitness magazines… but the only thing I could muster was a few, free guest posts that were sometimes attacked by douchebag commenters.
It was fucking hard.
I was working for peanuts, running across the street during any gaps in my schedule to write, and running back to train until 9pm. And why should I think this would get any better?
The year before that, I was mopping floors and cleaning toilets as a janitor for Results Fitness.
It didn’t help that neither of my parents had faith in me.
“Fuck this,” I said. “I’m going to follow my dream and become a strength coach.” So I emailed people.
I cold-emailed over 50 strength coaches in the US, Asia, and Europe to learn.
I had a beer one of the best soccer strength coaches in the MLS. I Skype-called an EPL coach minutes before kickoff… to the Super Bowl. (I’ll tie in this story at the end.) I visited campus upon campus. I even randomly met Clay Matthews.
But I’m not telling you this to show “how great I am.”
I’m telling you this because I was confused as shit and doing this on my dime.
Finally, I got three offers to become a strength coach intern. One with an NFL training center. One with a prestigious university. And one with a prestigious prep school.
I said “no” to each one.
The path was not what I expected: if you want to be a real college or pro strength coach, the road is pitiful.
Years and years of unpaid work. Working from 5am to 8pm for people who don’t care about you because you’re so replaceable. My mentor was the strength coach for a Division-I university… and was on welfare.
(If you really want it, that’s great, but just know it’s a hard path.)
I tried being an online trainer. I offered free trials and several people stiffed me — didn’t even leave me a testimonial and never responded to my emails. Then I tried calling and emailing sites for partnerships.
I emailed every single Top 100 PGA instructor.
Nothing.
One golf coach said this might be something he’s interested in the future. “But I’m not sure right now.” Another one was put off by my pricing model and declined.
So I continued at my commercial gym. “Maybe,” I thought, “I could get better at what I do.”
Well, I knew something was really wrong when I invested over $5000 of my own hard-earned money in online courses, books, and Perform Better seminars and their tactics didn’t work at my company. I had about 12 straight consultations — not one single purchase. Others were converting six… a month.
It sucked because I knew I had the skills; I just couldn’t get the clients. It was getting hopeless.
“Maybe I’m just not cut to be a trainer,” I thought. “Maybe it’s time to give up.”
I started to message contacts in the finance world again.
One October night, while studying my course, I listened to an interview with a girl who switched careers and was making a multi-six-figure income. She said this throwaway line:
One year is a long time to waste. Don’t waste two.
Ugh. That’s exactly what I was doing. I wanted to quit, but I was compounding my mistake my holding on. And it hurt to hear that.
I wasn’t that adventurous 21-year-old kid who moved to South Korea and did anything he could to travel the world anymore — I was 25, sitting in the same room I lived in as a kid, going nowhere, and struggling to save money.
Some nights, I wished I never left Asia.
So I paused the audio, wrote my resignation letter, and signed it.
“Don’t quit, man,” my friends and colleagues said. “Find something first and then quit.” But I couldn’t. I couldn’t delay it anymore. Every morning I woke up, I didn’t want to go to work and I thought about quitting everyday for months.
Training wasn’t fun anymore. (It wasn’t even about training anymore — it was business.) I had no backup plan and there was only one tiny glimmer of hope:
I started writing for Muscle & Fitness.
Remember all the hard work I put in writing for free? One person recognized and praised that. He helped connect me. He trusted me.
So I quit. November 4th was my last day.
What was I going to do? I didn’t know. Maybe write more and find another job being a trainer? Maybe just train privately?
So I emailed people. I talked to people. I asked. I listened. I took notes. And I took more notes. I flew out to New York to meet editors and connectors. I flew to Toronto to… well… that one was for fun, honestly [wink].
The more I wrote, the more I loved it. Shit, I wrote a few articles while staying on my friend’s couch in Toronto. And even though I was some thin Asian kid with three years of experience, the message was the same:
I could write.
[Fun fact: I was a horrible writer in high school and college. My English teacher in high school sent me to detention and, yes, I cheated a lot. (My finest moment was being sent to the counselor’s office and being put on academic probation.) I hated all the books they assigned. My vocab tests were awful. I didn’t — and still don’t — know what a fucking “predicate” is.]
Meanwhile, my clients from the commercial gym didn’t come with me. They invested too heavily, they said. Or they were accustomed to the style of gym.
So I kept writing and I kept emailing. One cold, windy December morning, I emailed a major editor/publisher and he responded within minutes. “Actually,” he wrote, “I can hop on the phone with you right now, if you have time.”
That led to a huge gig.
And it turned out that a lot of people I previously emailed years ago really weren’t as good as they claimed. They had made themselves seem bigger than they were, so once I surpassed them, they were shocked.
Then, I got an advanced copywriting gig. Remember all those online courses I bought? They blew my managers away.
And remember that golf coach who wasn’t sure if he had a role? Well, they brought me in — as their Fitness Instructor.
Things were falling into place. All after I quit?!
Yep. I guess it allowed the swirl of activity happening in the background to finally come forward and shine.
Soon, I got more gigs and more pay. That led to even more gigs. “You’re not a beginner anymore,” one editor told me. “You can ask for way more.”
So I did. And I received.
Life is different now.
I don’t train clients in-person anymore. I still like learning about fitness, I write more, and I take days off. I run my own remote marketing business and travel around the world full-time.
I don’t wake up with a groan. I take my time and enjoy my breakfast. But when I work, I work.
I smile a lot more, too.
But can I tell you one thing from the heart?
If you ever think about quitting a job or trying something new, just do it. Don’t fucking delay — that’s more wasted time and pain.
“What if I don’t have a backup plan?” you might ask.
Well, that’s an inappropriate question because you’re trying to solve a problem with the same mindset that got you that shitty job in the first place.
Enjoy the power of serendipity. Be confident in your resourcefulness. And, if all else fails, sometimes it helps to know that your true friends will love you, no matter what.
Sure, I’m not “mega successful” or whatever: I don’t own a million-dollar company, I don’t have a yacht, and I don’t have thousands of happy customers. But I have made mistakes.
And that counts, too.
It’s your life, baby.
Use it.
Oh yeah, one more thing: remember the EPL coach I told you about? I called him back in 2013, minutes before the Ravens and 49ers faced off in a great Super Bowl, and I never forgot that gesture and how much he helped. I wanted to pay him back, so I did — almost exactly one year later (LINK).
Thanks mate.
Hey Anthony,
It’s Jason from Equinox. I’ve been reading a few of your blogs here and there and I love them. I also wanted to say that I’m so happy for you and so proud of all that you’ve accomplished, if anybody deserves it, it’s definitely you man. I miss you and hope to see you soon, hit me up sometime.
Best wishes,
Jason
Hey Jason, thanks so much for the comment. I miss you too, dude. Walking into the Equinox those Saturdays and seeing you and Blake behind the desk made my day. All the best, and we’ll talk soon. 🙂
Hi, I’m so glad I stumbled upon your blog because now I’m more confident and inspired to chase after my dreams. To be honest, I was a bit scared not knowing what to expect with my future fitness career but after reading this, I definitely feel your passion and hunger for success. I wish you nothing but the best on spreading your wisdom and sharing your success with others 🙂
Hey Yumee,
I’m glad you enjoyed it and found it helpful. As I write this, I’m sitting outside and watching two little kids play in a large fountain, spraying water on each other, and enjoying a game they invented themselves. My point (beside sounding like a huge creeper) is that we all had that childlike mentality at some point in our lives, which wasn’t afraid to be creative, silly, and free. If we can uncover that spirit inside, we can’t lose.
I can’t convey just how perfectly timed your article was for me. I’ve been wrestling with this decision for months now, and you just put the final brick in place. Thank you.
Alicia, thanks for your comment. That is so awesome and I wish you the best of luck! Embrace the power of serendipity! 🙂
Anthony, remember that night we sat in the car and talked about my future plans? I didn’t know you felt so similarly to me. Whether your dreams and goals hit you back or not, your journey is beautiful and impressive. I have yet to walk a worthwhile journey nor have I achieved, but it was nice to see there are courageous people out there who can still speak their hearts out. Keep it going.
Thanks for the comments, Arang. I do remember that, and I remember we felt the same about how the future should be — spent doing the things that we love. You’ll find that journey soon enough. I appreciate the kind words.
Love the honesty and realness, brother!
Thanks, Matt! Thanks for reading, bro. 🙂
Thanks, Matt! It’s great to know this has been so helpful. 🙂
I feel the same way you had felt… I want to quit too but I am so afraid too. I have gifts and talents that I can use, please give me advice.. I don’t care if it is harsh or will hurt my feelings. I just need help!
Thanks for the comment, Erica. I’d love to help you, but the question you asked me is very vague. Thus, the best I can do is give you a vague answer. Can you ask something more specific? Send me an email: anthony.j.yeung@gmail.com
It’s a true pleasure to see you happy and loving what you are doing. Love the story, this will give people guts and courage to make a change.
Thanks for the kind words, Don. I hope so too.
I think your story all goes back to what i discovered a year ago, its called THE SECRET’. It says, you always get what you want in life if you believe you deserve it and that you can have it. The fact that you never stopped pushing for what you wanted clearly proves that, with hard work we can all achieve things beyond our wildest imaginations.
Awesome comment, Tshaiamo. Thanks for sharing your secret — beautiful insights there!
Anthony this is beautiful . Truly touched my heart. I’m so happy you are doing well..
Thanks, Maddy. I’m glad you found it so helpful. Remember when I would hang out at the Kids Club when it was dead upstairs? Those were some of my highlights. Hope you’re well.
Hi Anthony, your story is very inspiring especially right now for me, I just quit my job because I am not happy anymore just like you, I don’t want to wake up and go to my previous job unhappy and I am very confused on what path to choose but Luckily, today morning when I woke up and read this article, it really lifts me up to do more on my dreams. I want to be happy doing the things I want to do. No more confusion, no more stressing myself, just go straight to what I really love doing. Thank you and More power.
Thank you so much for your comment, Liza. I’m so happy this article helped you, and that’s so great that you’re following your dreams and seeking to be happy doing the things you want do. Keep us updated! 🙂
“Find something you love to do, and you’ll never work a day in your life” ― Harvey MacKay Incredible stuff Anthony, and truly testament to that quote! So often we wear a rut in life, going to and from our 9 to 5’rs that we forget what we were even doing here. We wake up one day and we have worked over two-thirds of our life to finally begin living the last third. Occasionally, some of us peek out over the ruts, we see other folks charging a different course defying the rules of the mediocrity. We find ourselves inspired to seek the FREEDOM that these folks have found.
Thanks for sharing & best of luck!
Griz
Thanks so much, Clark! I’m happy you found it so helpful. 🙂
You continue to surprise me! I don’t think I had heard this struggle yet. I’m glad you were able to make it through and now look at you!
Thanks, Mark. You’re too kind, brotha. Let’s keep pushing each other forward! 🙂
Hello anthony,
My name is sade and I dont even know how I stumbled upon this article, but I’m glad I did. I want to quit my job soooo bad but, because of responsibilities and things of that nature, I’m torn. I know the career path I want to go in just scared to take the risk. But, it’s great to see there are people out there besides myself who want to get out of a shitty job. Lol. Thanks for the motivation!
Hi Sadie,
Thanks for the comment and for sharing your story! I admire your courage to choose your career path despite the risk — don’t forget you always have your tenacity and resourcefulness to get out of anything. 🙂 Hope to see you comment again in the future.
Hi Anthony
I quit my job and moved to another country to be with my husband. He doesn’t want me to apply for residency because he doesn’t have a permanent plan for us to be here. I’m already feeling so down and depressed because i used to earn fairly well and i don’t anymore. (There is only so much housework i can do). I dont know if I did the right thing moving for him. And now I’m thinking of moving back to my own country and having a long distance relationship with him. Meanwhile try to get back into my industry.Which he is not happy about either because he can’t do long distance relationships. I don’t know what to do.
That’s a tough situation. What are your options?
Thank you for the article. I am in between jobs, almost 50, and a single parent. I had the guts to give two weeks notice without anything lined up and without an actual plan. I am a lot less miserable now that I am not behind a desk pushing paper with a lot of competitive “office politics”
Keep writing!
Lauren
Thanks for the comment, Lauren! Congrats for quitting and for showing that courage. Glad to hear you’re feeling better as well. Keep us updated. 🙂
Hey Anthony, thanks for the article, and the song was a perfect accompaniment. I gave my two-week notice today. Scary stuff as I am leaving a career I’ve invested years in. But, I was treated badly at this job and it is time to move on. Like you, I am a writer, and a damned good one. I’m thinking of hanging out a shingle as a technical writer. And, I hope to work for myself from now on. Ok, the scary bit is over. I’ve stepped off of the cliff. Most importantly, my wife is sticking by me. Now lets see what happens!
Hi Charlie, thanks for commenting. Congrats on the big decision and I applaud your courage to make the move. It’s never easy, but I’m glad you have confidence in yourself and your own abilities. (And, for what it’s worth, I’m confident you’ll succeed.) Feel free to keep me updated with the process. 🙂
I’m not sure if you still log on to read the comments, but I gave my 30 day to my company. I’ve been in my field around 13 yrs. I’ve worked for this particular company almost 4. I admire how you didn’t give up. I am a little afraid of losing everything, but I realize how this company has me by the neck. I also realized how small I am to them. I can be easily replaced. Even though I love what I do, I just do not have the energy anymore. Wish me luck! Hopefully I will be telling my story to help someone one day. Kudos to you!
Hi Nicole! Sorry for the delay… for some reason I didn’t receive this notification. Wow, I’m so impressed with your courage and I’m confident you’ll do well. How are things going for you? Thank you for your kind words and keep me posted. 🙂
Anthony,
I just read this article and I must say, this has helped a lot. I’m currently dealing with workplace stress and major depression. I just found out someone I went to high school with passed away. He was only 28. And that hit me. Life is too short for me to be dealing with a lot of this shit. I kind of have a plan but only if it works out. I’m working on getting into business school (I’m an engineer) and moving back to Canada, which is where I grew up. I’ve saved up a decent amount of money (and credit card points) that I can travel for a while. My dad is talking about going to Europe for a while to travel. It’s been many many years since he and I travelled together so that’s another option.
Keep up the good work eh!
Martin, thanks so much for your comment. I’m terribly sorry to hear about your classmate passing, but I’m happy to see how you’re responding to the situation and focusing on what you want (and with your Dad too — sounds fun). Life really is too short for dealing with bullshit.
Once you get to the other side, you’ll breathe that fresh air and never look back. The hardest part is taking that first step. It’ll come… I’m confident.
Hi Anthony — I just quit my job today and trying to breathe. I’m working on convincing myself that my current depression is from my soon-to-be past life. I paid 1/3rd of my small paycheck on commuting/parking. I wrote research and arguments that were being used in big meetings but it never got me anywhere. It was shocking.
But I wrote, thought, research, created and it will take me somewhere. I was getting bullied at work (which was investigated and proven to be true) and still nothing, not even a “sorry”. My parents, old school, kept telling me to buck up, hang in there, all my hard work will lead to better things, as I felt myself slipping further in depression. They raised the parking by 50 cents an hour and it was a sign, there were many signs but that was it.
I am going to work on my research projects, take my online computer science programs, and just network, network while doing freelance accounting. Thank you. I am glad I found this today.
Sarah, thank you for your comment and I’m impressed with your decision. I’m sorry to hear about how difficult and troubling that experience was and I’m looking forward to hearing how things change and improve. It’s funny: when I worked at my old job, there were so many signs too, but I chose to ignore it. Once I listened to them, however, everything changed for the better. Thanks again. 🙂
Hi Anthony,
I have been contemplating to quit my job, thinking of it made me feel so sad. Being a single mother and raising your child alone is a very tough job. I hate my job and I want to quit but am literally scared to dead thinking about my responsibility. Am really depressed at the moment and don’t know what to do.
Hi Rehana, thanks for your comment. Your fears and concerns are perfectly normal! In fact, because you’re a single mother, I think that’s a very responsible worry. So that’s my first comment: You’re normal. 🙂 What are some things you feel are holding you back?
Hi Anthony,
Great Post!! I was wondering, would you have quit your job anyway if you had made more money at the time? I have a great paying job but have lost interest in the field I am in right now. I have been toying with the idea of leaving and pursuing some hobbies for a while just to see how if it all works out. Life is too short to sit in a cubicle 9 hours a day, there’s so much to see and do with so little time.
Hi Brenda! I took at look at your website — I love it! Great stuff. To answer your (great) question, yes I would. Money would’ve helped my bank account and credit cards, but that feeling of waking up every damn morning and wanting to quit wore on me. Ultimately, when I heard that woman say “one year of your life is no joke,” money became trivial — it became about freeing myself from a web of unpleasantness.
What about your job keeps you there? And how would you like to feel about your situation?
Hey Anthony,
I would honestly say that working from 9-5 doesn’t suit me at all. Sure, there are lots of people who need to struggle with jobs. However, the fact that I felt no soul in me whenever I was working terrified me. I remembered having no desire to create something at that time. It was such a depressing experience that I was being robbed from the activities I used to enjoy like writing. I am still quite skeptical for leaving the job and venture the world on my own. But, my interest in writing has saved me. Now, I just started a music blog. From this, I’ll do my best into monetizing it since I don’t think that I would be happy being under control by others in a company ever again. I feel sorry for all the people who counted on me for finding a typical good job. I just cannot.
As a 20 years old college student, developing skills by working for companies is the best option into settling into a good career in the future. However, my mind is just focusing on the present. It’s just the music blog that I believe I can enjoy doing till I die.
It may be not a wise decision. I am such a naive person for sure, but who cares in the long run?
Well said, Sharon. Thanks for sharing your journey and best of luck on your blog.
Hi ,
I have depression. Just like you everyday i wake up and wish i quit from this job. Today i’m worse than other day. I go search on google on when i can quit the job. The problem is, i always want it but i feel guilty because the job not that bad. The workers and my boss all good and care, but i always avoid them bevause i feel dont know how to talk with them. So i just ask about some important stuff
Only the distance is too far, the salary is not that good and the annual leave is very limited. I put myself in trouble when i do part time study now. Which now i cant afford to buy important things like car.
My dream is to write fiction. Recently there was a contest to write for a book. I want to join but not doing it. Because after working i’m so tired to do anything that need to think.
About this work, i dont know if i become like this because of depression or because of the work
i qui my job because i fell in a love with my coworker but i also was becoming to needy and attached. Plus my bosses were assholes. I also was going Through a major change in my life trying to juggle work, school. and going to the gym … I became more depressed after my infatuation with my coworker was not reciprocated. THis all happened during quarantine. I want to go back to my job but i dont want to reurnt just for her. im basically trying to study now and workout hoping for the best. I know i will get over this. also my mindset was just not at peace.
Wishing you the best of luck on that! I’m confident you’ll get through.