These Twelve Words Will Put Everything In Perspective

There are quite a few quotes I’ve taken the time to memorize. One of which goes like this:

Sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck.

(This quote is commonly attributed to the Dalai Lama, but it might be a myth.)

Ain’t that the fucking truth.

I think back on all the things I “wanted” in college and, if I actually got them, my life would be different — I would be living in Manhattan, working 80 hours a week at an investment bank like Morgan Stanley, and renting a loft.

But it doesn’t stop there.

Truth be told: South Korea wasn’t my first teaching choice in Asia. It was Taiwan followed by Hong Kong. But because of a lack of credentials on my part and a lack of availabilities on their part, my recruiter, Teach Away, suggested South Korea.

When I was in Taiwan, my number one goal was to find a finance job. In Fall 2010, I was actually meeting a few guys from Fubon Securities almost every week, but I couldn’t get a position because I had to pass a rigorous exam, which was completely in Chinese (of course).

Or how about my fiasco in Australia? One night in April, I stood on the balcony of my friend’s place, saw a shooting star over Sydney, and wished for sponsorship for a work visa. (I would eventually get it, but soon after, the company went under.)

When I came back to the US, I worked at the NFL and lasted a whopping seven days before I quit.

After my internship at Results Fitness, I wanted so badly to become a coach there that I accepted a position as their one-and-only janitor. The plan was to wait until a position became available, then get promoted from within — I worked there for six mortifying weeks before I quit and, after a horrid turn-of-events, I left with absolutely nothing to show for it.

Then, I wanted to be a strength coach. (At least, I thought I did.) That is, until I met the asshole of a strength coach who offered me an internship at his “prestigious” program.

This goes on and on. (Lets not forget the girls I dated.)

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At the end of the day, not getting what I’ve wanted has paid off time and time again.

When I don’t get what I want in life, it forces me to backtrack and find another path and direction. I have to analyze my goals, check their validity, and expand my horizons.

Then, after the deep introspection and change that comes from those obstacles, sometimes I don’t even want those things anymore. If someone hypothetically offered me all the crap I thought I wanted years ago, would I accept them?

Hell no!

Today, the thought of spending 80 hours a week in an office gives me conniptions. The idea of waking up at four in the fucking morning to stumble into the gym of a Division-II university and train Men’s Crew makes me nauseous. And, to be honest, there’s no way in hell I would ever want to be an English teacher again. (Unless it was with adults and executives or something.)

Nowadays, whenever I don’t get what I want, I’ll ponder the situation and decide maybe I got lucky. Maybe I dodged a hidden bullet and maybe, by sacrificing a short-term desire, I can find something I truly enjoy much further along the journey of life.

It takes the sting out of failure.

And it puts things in perspective.